Man Law

The name should say it all, but in case it doesn't I am here to try and explain something that has occurred in our house: Man Law.

It happens when you ask your dad a question that doesn't seem to have an easy answer and he replies, "punt".

It is what causes a father to punch his perfectly peaceful son, who is minding his own business, and not receive anything more than a chuckle from said son.

Man Law has no respect for gender, and if you are the "fortunate" female in any given situation prepare to play according to the unwritten rules it sets forth. For instance:

Strictly speaking, interruption of a televised sporting event should involve blood - and even then it is up for debate.

Don't question the need to buy twice as much equipment as necessary for any given adventure. What isn't used is recognized as "research" and validated in the R&D department of his brain.

Under no circumstances should a woman try to understand the timing or priority of correspondence. Men think we have ESP, but with the lack of actual speaking that goes on between their own gender I am convinced it is the other way around. We at least have to communicate our thoughts with words, be they spoken or written. They simply need to be in the same room to count it as quality time.

Decorating of any kind is entirely optional. A poster is not decoration, it is art.

Clothing only hinders a man's wife from truly appreciating the physique of wonder God blessed him with, regardless of how well her cooking has added to the original form.

And the ultimate of all:

Never, ever give up the garage.